Who is your “Abigail”--one who has kept you from sin by appealing to your conscience? Do you seek this ministry from fellow believers? How so? How often? (Serendipity Bible 10th Anniversary Edition, p.442).
We
all sense a great divide, a huge gap between direct appeals to
conscience and manipulative ones. Manipulative ones seek to put us
on a guilt trip. Manipulation in this sense is clearly illustrated
when a child pouts to get his way. The parent, sensing the child's
intent, has little patience with such behavior and the result is
often the exact opposite from what the child intended. Sometimes in
attempting to get a rise out of my wife, I will say, “Sure dear, go
to your women's group, I don't mind staying here all by myself until
dark.” This is clearly a form of adult pouting—a bald-faced
attempt to induce guilt through manipulation and indirection.
The
preferable course is direct and not indirect appeals to conscience.
In this case I would say to my wife, “Please don't leave me this
afternoon, I want your company.” While not explicitly using the
word “conscience,” this is nevertheless a clean, direct appeal
without devious use of manipulation. She may go anyway, but without
the uneasy feeling that I was seeking to play games with her emotions
and intentionally using her to get my way though application of
guilt trips.
While
indirect, exploitive appeals to conscience are heard too often;
direct appeals are surely heard too little. Direct appeals actually
signal respect and bring dignity to the decision process: "Before taking this action, please examine your conscience." Ask
yourself, “When is the last time I've heard a direct, explicit, and
forthright appeal to conscience?” My guess is—maybe forever.
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